Gutsy Chick Podcast

Busting Vagina Myths with Allissa Alter

• Amanda Smith • Episode 55

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In this episode of the Gutsy Chick Podcast, Alissa Alter is back to help us normalize conversations about women's health. We’re exploring body awareness, birth trauma, and the importance of pelvic health.  

In this Episode:  

00:00 Preparing for Galentine’s Day  

07:06 Talking to your children about vulvas, vaginas, and periods 

15:07 Tears and Episiotomies 

21:56 The Importance of Recovery and Physical Therapy 

23:26 Understanding Prolapse and Pelvic Health 

30:56 Embracing Aging and Wisdom 

32:44 The Value of Intergenerational Relationships 

40:05 Vaginal Health and Hygiene Tips 

44:35 The Connection Between Pleasure and Health 

 

Here’s how to connect with Alissa Alter: 

 

www.AlissaAlter.com 

Watch Gutsy Chick Podcast on YouTube!

Check out more from Amanda:
Website: Body Whisper Healing
Instagram: @Amanda.G.Smith
Facebook: Body Whisper Healing
Pinterest: AmandaGSmithBWH
LinkedIn: Amanda (Ritchie) Smith

Take the Gutsy Chick Quiz to find out how your athletic mindset might be holding you back from healing your chronic health issue: https://gutsychickquiz.com





Alissa Alter I am so stoked to have the Amy Poehler of Vaginas back. Thank you so much. am so happy to be here, Amanda. Thank you so much for having me back. Well, I mean, you had the most views, the most listens in all of 2024 on spirit of an athlete. And now we've rebranded to the gutsy chick podcast. So welcome to the gutsy chick podcast. Yay. All right. So this episode is going out on Valentine no, Galentine's day, Galentine's day. And you know, Valentine's Day is the very next day. Who came up with this idea? I love the concept of Valentine's Day. But what woman has time during the week to gather her friends? So, Galentine's Day is Thursday, Valentine's Day is Friday. Who's got time for this? for real. mean, I get, I feel like then if we're supposed to have a whole party the day before, which I mean, listen, you should always get together with your friends. Like it's never a bad idea. But I also, doesn't that then put even more pressure on like the heteronormative expectations of Valentine's Day? Like am I supposed to wait then so then I don't say don't plan it. anything but so my partner has to read my mind, plan everything, has to be perfect, aka I'm gonna get mad at him. and it's got to outdo Galentine's day. Right? Like I feel like that's, again, this is like way too much pressure and I feel like life is hard enough. Let's I mean, it's it's nice that Valentine's Day is on a Friday this year, right? So we can but that means that every restaurant on the planet is going to be booked. So guys, if you didn't, if you this, you're screwed. You're gonna follow up the hangover from the girlfriend's Galentine's night? Uh-huh. That doesn't necessarily mean everybody gets hungover. they should just be a week apart because also let's like spread the love, right? Like let's, then we can celebrate all the loves and have time to recover in between. my God, I love that, right? And the older we get, the more time we need to recover. Seriously. Seriously! And who's got the energy to plan all of those things? Right? No, no. I Galentine's should be easy, right? Girlfriends, let's go. But the more I age, the more I notice that my girlfriends really need a lot of prep time. So like, Galentine's day is in the calendar. We know that it exists. But like, We're recording this on February 5th. Like, I'm late. yeah, we're late. We might as well just give up. We missed the boat. This is our Galentine's Day. Okay. All right. Get your coffee, get your, get your drink, whatever you're There we go. Okay. So Valentine's day with the Amy puller of vaginas. We're talking vaginas today. Okay. So men prepare yourselves. You're going to learn a lot about the vagina. love the fact that, that you're willing and ready and Raren to listen to us talk about vaginas if you're still sticking around. Women, stick the frick around. Okay, first and foremost, why are you the expert on vaginas? that's such a good question. And you know, I'm always very clear and transparent about this, that I am a doctor of nothing. So, you know, there are limits to my expertise. I'm not gonna look at yours or touch yours or examine it, but I will invite you to do that. How am I, why am I the expert? I think. A large part of that is that I became so frustrated with my own lack of knowledge and understanding of my own body. And I can't tolerate that. I won't tolerate that. So I did a lot of research on my own so that then I could ask my doctor questions. I could ask my physical therapy. Friends, questions about muscle tissue. Then I could talk to my pelvic health physical therapy friends about specifically the pelvic floor, but also the vagina, the vaginal walls are made of muscle. And so, you know, how this muscle behaves versus how this muscle behaves, you know, as an athlete, if you overstretch or tear a muscle, right, what are we considering in our recovery process? Why are we not talking about that about my vagina? Because I'm supposed to not talk about it. We're supposed to be silent about it, ashamed, disgusted, horrified, pretend it's not there. And I think that piece is also why I'm the expert because I don't believe in TMI. And I think it is weird that I can't talk about these muscles. Yet I am supposed to be so obsessed with the muscles of my abdomen, my butt, my arms, that I go to weird measures to meet a certain standard, right, that depending on your genetics may or may not even be possible, right? And that's super normal. But if I know that like the right side of my pelvic floor is like a little bit weaker or not as quick to respond as my left side, which runs a little bit tighter, which also affects how my hips function and also my feet and my bunions and that some scar tissue from childbirth sometimes gets tight. And I also feel that as limited range of motion through my inner that's weird. That's weird. But if I'm not, but starving myself or, you know, I'm using a dramatic thing, like going again to like extreme measures to make sure that you see my ab lines. That's not weird. Yeah, we covered, yes, we normalized the first time that you were on Spirit of an Athlete, we normalized this conversation. And so today's conversation, we're filters be damned, essentially. We are going deeper into the vagina. my God. Men need to know. you know, I have two sons. They're very little. One of them is just starting to talk. So I mean, he'll absorb this conversation, but like, he's not totally a part of it yet. But my five year old, like, he knows, like he has a penis and I have a vulva. Right? Because how many people say, well, and I have a vagina. And it's like, well, you're which Are you talking about my vagina or like all of my genitals were just gonna say that because... vulvas again like is that weird that's what it is right but like i'm very proud that my son told like he's like you have a vulva mom and i'm like that is correct nailed it okay. I probably need to have that conversation with my 10 year old, almost 11 year old daughter. Cause we do call it vagina, but I've never spelled out like the vulva. Yeah. Yeah. The canal. Yeah. The, the entrance and the exit is. It's one of your options for penetration. And if you have a vaginal birth, that's where a baby's coming out of. Yeah, and if you're menstruating, that's where blood flows. That's where blood flows. That's where you would place a menstrual cup or a tampon or there are discs now and also yeah, that's where that's coming from. Yeah, yeah. Yes, those conversations are in my near future. Ha! which I've exposed her to those kinds of things because she's in the bathroom when I'm menstruating and you know, she's going to see the things that I'm doing and I'm open to her knowing like this is what's happening and this is why it's happening. It's different with boys though. Do you explain to them what's going on when you're menstruating? Yeah, because he was in the bathroom with me once and there was blood and I saw him see it. And I was like, you see there's blood. And he was like, yeah. And he said, I have my period. I was like, I'm not hurt. This is how I was like, this happens once a month and this is how I know that there's not a baby in my belly. Nice. Nice. so far, that's the explanation. When there needs to be more, there will be. He has asked me like in restrooms, there will be a sign that says like, you know, I'm like the little. on the bathroom door or right above the. products. And then on like the little trash bin, it's like, you can put them here. And he was like, you know, he asked me, what does that say? And then water sanitary products. And I'll say, you know how once a month I get my period, he said, yes. I said, it's something that you use so that you don't get blood all over your underwear. and share it with other people. Yeah, like I'm like, it's the products that you use for that. that again, so far has been enough. He's young. I'm sure he'll have more questions at some point, or I will simply offer more information. But you know, with all of that stuff again, like normalizing these conversations and our bodies, the more we confront these things ourselves and get clear, you know, get clear and comfortable with it. then we can share this information with younger people without those layers of all the other stuff that's not serving anybody. So are these some of the topics that you cover on your podcast myth of motherhood? Oh, I do. I cover so many things on my podcast, Myth of Motherhood, and I started the podcast as I was really... working through my birth trauma from my first son. And I had a lot of trauma that I was working through and it brought up a lot of things for me. about myself and then also in my marriage, you know, the expectations that are put on you and the pressures put on you as the birthing person, as a woman, even if like I am married to a man, we have a very, like we have a very equal partnership and still. just by giving birth and I was breastfeeding, it's like so many gendered things were just existing and being exacerbated and I was furious and there were times I was like, why are you so stupid? Like you're such a smart man. You're too smart to be this dumb. And then having to find space to be like, you don't know what you're doing either, but you think I do, but I don't know. And stop assuming I do. And all of these... And that's how I started my podcast was like working through all of that, not just ranting about him, but like the moments of catching myself in perpetuating these things that were making me miserable and normalizing my own part in that so that I could make it different and sharing that experience. And then over time as I dealt with that, and then I got pregnant again and I talked a lot about my recovery from a fourth degree tear, which is where you tear from your vagina all the way through to your rectum. And I don't recommend it. And these are muscles. And muscles heal, right, if you know what to do and you address them. So I do, talk about, I have one episode called the brain-vagina connection. I do, I sing, I rewrote the lyrics to the rainbow connection that Kermit the Frog sings, but about the brain and vagina connection, because they're connected. And so, yeah, I use this as a fun place for all my quirky ideas and perspectives and bringing together seemingly disparate topics, but they're not. It's all connected and really taking like how I became the vagina expert, these things that we're really not supposed to talk about and talking about them in a way that's not, it doesn't have to be weird. Yep, normalize, normalize, normalize. It's part of our anatomy. but you know what else is uncomfortable? Picking up weights for the first time. You know what else is uncomfortable? Like setting a boundary. You know what else is uncomfortable? Like getting your period. Like there's so many things that are uncomfortable, but when you move through and with the discomfort, you grow, you make gains, things get better, you get stronger, you have fun, you know? Mm-hmm the more you know, right? I remember that commercial as a kid with the little star and the rainbow behind it the more You know and I'm like, yes, I am here for that Okay Fourth degree tear Versus a pez otomy Great question. What do you know? So in episiotomy, they're not, they used to be done more routinely. They're not as routine now. And that is where they will like use a surgical scissor and cut part of the vaginal wall, but also more the perineum, the area between the vaginal opening and the anal sphincter to widen the opening to help your baby come out. Mm-hmm. I actually had that and then, but then that's not where I tore. I tore elsewhere and it tore all the way through. happened? had fourth degree tears are not common with this, with, with the reports and all of that. It says it happens to one to 3 % of people. Is it because of a large head? It there's multiple factors. I do think that the rate of it happening is actually higher because there is a lot. are instances where people are repaired like it's a third degree tear or maybe they're repaired as it as it's a fourth degree, but it's only reported as a third degree. So I think some of the numbers aren't totally always accurate. It can happen for a variety of reasons. For me, it was like literally a perfect storm. is more like your chances increase of it happening if your baby is sunny side up. So instead of their face being towards your back, it's towards the front. So I had that. I do actually have both of my children have huge heads and like at birth, like 99th percentile. heads like they it is a genetic thing. I it is from my husband's side of the family. They really do have big heads. Now there is a whole my body is built for this my like there and I don't I don't want to make fun of that and it's true and our bodies like right I have all the equipment that is built to operate in this certain way and without these interventions people also people used to die. So things like this are also life-saving for both the birthing person and the baby. So that increases your chance. My child had a huge head. I am a small person. So, and the shape of my pelvis, but then not only was he sunny side up, he was rotated a little bit. So it was really the widest point. And then he did have a little bit of, he didn't have like full shoulder dystocia, which is where the baby's shoulder gets caught on your pelvis, which you, when that like really, really happens, babies can be born with a, their shoulder dislocates in birth. That didn't happen, but he got stuck. And the option at that point was to either help him out, which caused the tearing, right? And which didn't happen at the episiotomy, so I'm like two separate scars. Or the other thing that they could have done, which would have been more, even more physically and emotionally traumatic, is that they can bring you into the OR for a C-section, but they have to push, they have to move the baby back up. up with. like a whole rocking thing and they have to move the baby up and then bring them out. And then you really are recovering from a vaginal delivery and a C-section at the same time. It's a much... It's more than a double whammy. So the difference being the episiotomy is a cut made by the doctor. It usually stays about that size. Maybe there will be a little bit of additional tearing and then it's sewn up. And the fourth degree tear is when tearing of the vaginal wall and the perineum is a very common normal part of a vaginal birth. And there are different degrees of it. First degree tears usually don't even require a stitch. Second degree tear goes a little bit further into the perineum and the perineal body, which is like there's more muscles there. And that does require stitches. A third degree tear goes up to and sometimes tears part of the anal sphincter and a fourth degree tear goes right through that anal sphincter and tears part of your rectum also. So. It's not great. How many times have I said that? I didn't like it. Okay. I didn't like it. But the other thing with like episiotomy versus tearing, generally what happens with tearing is the muscles will tear where they're weakest and the tear will be somewhat, it's an irregular shape where like the muscle fibers tear, but it's an irregular shape. following the weakest points and then when it heals those tissues are looking to find each other again. Yeah, naturally. Naturally, whereas with a cut. It's linear, it's straight, like sure it's more straightforward, but in terms of healing, it can actually be a little bit more complicated because it's like the muscles didn't decide where they tore. Somebody else did. So like that sort of like your body doing it versus it being done to you, it sort of affects the healing process. Both are muscle tears. Mm-hmm. You know, if you tore your hamstring, you'd go to physical therapy, you would do some exercises, you would massage that scar tissue so that it doesn't get stiff, And immobile and restrict other areas of your body from moving, right? Like you'd address the fascia, you'd address the circulation. You, that, that all of that can be done for your vagina and your perineum and your butthole. Also, but so often it doesn't because I, cause people don't know there is a lot of emotional, all sorts of stuff, shame, upset, fear from having an injury in such a, an intimate area, right? Some people don't want to admit it. They don't know they have options. So many of those options are not covered by insurance. So you also have to have money. Right? Like there's so many barriers to it, which is horrible. I don't think that's good. That's also not good. I had no idea about that. That insurance wouldn't cover physical therapy. are some, there are starting to be more, but most of it is out of network and out of pocket. That breaks my heart. It's awful. because it's required for a full recovery, right? And then, know, if any, if you pull a back muscle and you never do anything about it. It haunts you the rest of your life. Right? You don't wonder why at 80, you're like, I can't really stand up anymore. Right? You're like, no, it's cause I have this, I have a bad back. Yet so many people who give birth 20 years later, like I don't understand why sex still hurts. I don't understand why I can't control when I pee or fart or, know, all of these things are why, why I have a prolapse. Um, And it's because an injury to your muscles wasn't addressed. And that's going to continue to be an issue. And now I said prolapse. So a prolapse is, Yeah, it's when it's I'm looking, I don't want to use dramatic words because again, there are levels, there are stages, there's so many options, but it's when your organs start descending. Like the that your vagina is made of muscles, the canal, it's made of muscles and they expand and they contract and that like that's part of an orgasm and they, you know, they do all of these things. Now, if those muscles are weak and the pelvic floor like lines up with like the vaginal entrance, right? All of those muscles, when they are strong and healthy and able to fully contract and fully release, which all healthy muscles are able to do both, full range of motion, all of that helps to support your bladder, your uterus, your rectum, being where they need to be in your lower abdominal cavity, within the pelvic bowl, whatever you want to call it, within the pelvis. If these muscles weaken and they can't hold up all your organs well, they descend. And it can be a little bit where you never notice. It can be where you look at your vagina and you're like, what is that? Like, I kind of see something new in there. And what it is is maybe it's your rectum, maybe it's your uterus, maybe it's your bladder leaning on the vaginal wall and the vaginal wall can't oppose that lean. And so it just kind of collapses in. It is very, people make jokes about your vagina falling out and all of that. That is a super, super extreme scenario. So just anyone who's afraid that that will happen, you have a better chance of tearing your butthole. Okay. Which you don't have a high chance of. So then the only way to really understand if you have a prolapse or not is to put your hand in there and feel it out. Or go to the doctor. you can go to the doctor. Usually the thing that people, the way the symptoms that people will have and the diagnosis could be, remember I'm a doctor of nothing, but the diagnosis could be, but this is when you would go to your doctor and say, I feel these things. Can you, could you inform me on what is the cause? If you have, if it's your bladder, which is called cysticel. If you're having incontinence of any kind, if you feel the urge to pee and you are peeing, like you can't hold it, and now you're peeing, that's urge incontinence. Or if you have stress incontinence, which is where like if you jump, if you sneeze, if you cough, you pee. Some of that could be that your bladder's now in a slightly different place. like, literally like all the pipes aren't lining up the way they need to and the nerves are doing different things. Cause it's like, what am I doing over here? This is, this is different, right? If it's a rectocele, that's when the rectum leans into the vaginal wall, which is different than a rectal prolapse. A rectal prolapse is when, yeah, like your rectum starts coming out of your, out of your anal sphincter. Not super common from childbirth, but it's a different thing. It's a different thing. You might notice that because suddenly you're constipated or you finish pooping, but you feel like you're not totally empty, but nothing more is coming out. And that's fully because your rectum's at a different angle and the rest of the poop can't come out. And so then you're kind of constipated because that poop's sitting there. and your body's just taken as much water as it can from it and it gets dry and then it's harder to poop. So that would be something if you notice that suddenly and that's not your body's jam, you ask your medical provider. And then the other, would say like is very common is just this feeling of heaviness in your pelvis or in your vagina. If you're standing a long time or if you're a runner, or you do like a lot of like higher impact kind of things. But also it's just like, if I stand too long, I just feel heaviness. You might have a prolapse. And the thing that I just want you to know. These were, there's so many muscles involved and muscles change. They change. They change depending on the stimulus they're getting the most often. And so you can go to physical therapy. You can listen to my podcast, download the free workout on my website. You can take one of my courses or work with me or some, can refer you to somebody else that, that you, these are muscles and muscles change and adapt and they never. stop. They don't ever stop. You can see, I know you know this too, Amanda. This is not what they're telling you on social media. They're telling you right now is the only time that you will never be able to build muscle again. You have to do it all right now. But that's not true. You can be 75 and start building muscle. It might take a little longer. Yes. You will build muscle and flexibility and strength and support because muscles adapt. I know plenty of women who started powerlifting in their 60s, got world records in their 70s, and are still powerlifting in their 80s. Powerlifting! about. That's what I'm talking And this is the energy we need. We're left. thinking that like, we're just, like our potential is so finite, but it's not. my God. Yeah. It, that it totally, well, once you can't make babies, right? That's like the narrative and it's, it is such trash. And, and it is changing. And people are realizing, yeah, those people are the, those are the wisdom holders. Those women who have made it through menopause are the wisdom holders because they have gotten to that point in their life where they've experienced all those major hormonal changes and they have all the damn knowledge now. Yeah. Yep. And they're powerful people. Yeah. on so many levels if they embrace it. And I'm surrounding myself with those women. I don't know about you, but I'm surrounding myself with those women. when I was about, I think I was like 24 or 25 at the time. And I was teaching at a studio on the Upper East Side of New York City. I taught there a long time. And one of my clients, I don't remember how old she was at the time, late 50s. And we like met for coffee another time and she was asking me things and I was like, my God, are we best friends? And she was like, we're definitely friends. And she shared with me, she said that one of the best pieces of advice that her mother had given her was to have friends of different ages, to always have friends that are older than you and always have friends that are younger than you. Yes. she said that she's done that and that it has enriched her life so deeply. And I fully, fully agree. Mm-hmm. This is why generational houses make so much more sense. And we don't do that in the United States, but having your elders with your babies, I mean, come on. Right? It makes both of them have richer lives. And then the one sandwiched in between us mamas, we get help. And it's... There are, they're there. I love that concept. And I'm starting to surround myself with friends who also are in the mode of I'm going to have a generational home and I'm so here for it. Yes. It's so necessary. like... something that this is something else I say to my son a lot because you know there are so he there are so many things that I know that he doesn't know right and he'll say how do you know this mom and I say I've just been here longer I have had more opportunities to experience things and gather knowledge I was like you are really smart you just haven't been here as long as I have Yep, experience wins. Right? But also sharing with him that it doesn't, this isn't, I'm smart and you're dumb. This is, I've just seen more. I've had the, I've been here longer, so I've seen more things. And now I'm sharing, I'm like, when you are my age, you will know all of these things and more. And you'll share it with somebody else. But I was like, you know, things that I don't know. So I get to learn from you also. And it's the same thing with our, you know, the generations, but they've been here longer. They have seen more things. We can benefit. All we can do is benefit from it. Why would we cut ourselves off from that? Right? Continue that. Okay, I'm curious. Your book, Unstuck From Under Study to the Study of Your Undercarriage. Did you write that in between the two kids or after you've had two kids? Or before? Between, mama. the two kids. Because before I, well guess it was a couple years before I had my son, I stopped performing professionally, but I was a Broadway performer. And there were a lot of experiences from that and my first marriage where I... there's this thing in theater where you have to like know your type and you're type casted and you know, know who your type is and then go out for the roles those people have played and sing the songs that those people sing so that casting directors know what to do with you and where to put you. And so, you know, for the early, like for the first part of my life, like I was... I talk about it as I was Alyssa Alter playing the role of Alyssa Alter. Because, right, like I was typecast as the good girl. I did everything right. I checked all the boxes. I was a straight A student. I starred in the musical. I said I was going to do musical theater. I did musical theater. I married my college sweetheart. He became an attorney. We but that's like it was all and I was miserable. And it was also I felt like I had no say. I was I had to do what? my ex-husband expected of me and professionally I had to do what was expected of me and my type. And then there was like one point in my career where they were saying I needed to dye my hair red because I'm funny and only redheads are funny, blondes can't be funny. And then I was like, that I was, I was, but then I was too pretty to play the comedic role, but not pretty enough to play Like the love interest, it was all because I didn't fit in the box. And I didn't fit in the box of my first marriage that I was cast in when I was 18 when I met him. So by the time I was 30, I was like, what is my life? And nobody is looking at me. am here, hello. Like the, not just Alyssa playing Alyssa, but like Alyssa, like why did... So yada, yada, yada, got divorced and I left the industry. You can read it about it in the book. But I also talk about how, you know, really though, it does feel like it's like I set my life on fire. I burnt it all to the ground. was like, this is not, this is not it. And like the decision of 18 year old Alyssa does not get to dictate the rest of my life. I have so much more ahead of me than behind me. And when my first son was born and I had that tear, like it messed me up. It messed me up. I was already working as I'd been teaching Pilates for 12 years at that point, a long time and specializing in pelvic health for a long time. So there was this like, I guess it would, I don't know if it's imposter syndrome, but like questioning of like, how dare I, because I failed. Yes. yes. Yes. garbage. It is garbage. And, um, it also, there's not a lot of data or information about what I could expect from my recovery, what I could expect for future births and being re-injured, what I could expect. I was like, what about menopause? What about when I'm 70? What does this mean? And there's no information because there's no information. And I write about in the book how I mourned that, but also how I moved through it. Because that wasn't like, that wasn't the first time my life had been torn apart, right? Or I had been torn apart. It was the first time, like the first time it was more emotionally and in terms of really my identity, but that happens again in motherhood. where your identity is torn apart. And again, like when I started my podcast, Myth of Motherhood, a lot of it was, putting that identity back together again. And wait a minute, wait a minute, a minute, wait a minute. When we talked about the episiotomy versus the tear, right? There's like such a, difference between when it comes from you and the way you can heal versus when it's put upon you and how you heal. So I, know, it's layered. It's jagged. It finds the weakest points. But that doesn't mean that you are weak. And again, you, like your muscles, are adaptable and can change. If you create an environment that provides supportive stimulus, you will respond to it. And so will your body. Mm, I love that. Alyssa, you and I could talk for days. It does every single time. Okay. I share just like two quick tips about your vagina? Well, not yours specifically, Amanda, right? Because I have not looked at nor touched nor am I going to, right? Because that's, I'm not, that would be, that would, that's illegal. Okay? yeah. that for everybody, anyone with a vagina, and if you are listening and you don't have a physical vagina, number one, know that you have an energetic vagina. And if you want to know more about it, download that free workout on my website. I will tell you all about it, alizahalter.com. And then what? And you'll find it. but you probably, if you don't have a physical vagina, you probably know someone with a physical vagina and you can support them in these two things. One. It is a self-cleaning oven. You just need water. Just water. Don't, don't, don't It doesn't need it. And if you add, you're gonna mess her up and she knows what she's doing. Okay? Does that include steam? This is... That could be a separate episode because I... I think in terms of hot hygiene, you're better off in just like a bath. Depends what you're putting in it, because it's also a dark, moist environment. And if you're adding herbs and oils and other things, these things are doing things, which we love. But in that delicate area, it can disturb the microbiome and the environment and what's growing. And it could lead to problems. And you have to be very careful about that sense that tissue is so delicate and sensitive and burning it. So, and I know that probably really hurts some people's feelings. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings, but I also want you to take care of your body and have really all of the information. And that brings me to my next topic, which is like, don't put weird stuff in your vagina. Okay. You don't need to put garlic cloves up there. for a yeast infection. You could put monistat. But like, you also don't need a JDAG because also in terms of muscle function, we don't want to create tension. You want engagement of muscles, not gripping intention and holding. That's not dynamic. That is not responsive. That will not give you better orgasms and it will not help with your continence or healthy muscles and then hip function, which how your hips functioning. Also remember I talked about my bunions, like it's going to affect your feed and your back and your neck. And suddenly you have headaches and it's like, because I'm carrying this jade egg all the time. So I know I hurt somebody else's feelings with that and I'm sorry. but I care about, and I care about your health. sorry. You have, like, it's all about function, right? And my engineering brain's going, okay, from a structural perspective, we don't shove things into holes and then expect those holes to hold onto them when we weight train. We just pick things up off the floor. We just push things over our head. hold it here for an hour. We don't just do one arm sometimes, sometimes. right? Like it's like, it's, we can and I, Amanda like, like I know you're with me on this. Like I also am like, I love Wu. I, this is not one or the other. It's that we can really use both and, and make, use our critical thinking skills and all. of our wisdom. It doesn't have to be one or the other. And make really informed like good decisions for ourselves and our bodies. Yeah, yeah. I love that you're self-educated, experientially educated. You've written a book. You have a podcast. Like all of these things make you the expert. And you own one, so it helps. a mega nerd about the pelvic floor. I can't get enough! That's what I'm here for. That's why we're having these conversations because, you bring light to it. There's levity to how you share and that helps tremendously because it is a sensitive topic because it's a sensitive area because there's a ton of nerves in that area. And that's why it's so sensitive. it's all sensitive and we just we don't have to make it harder. We don't have to make it. We don't have to make it heavier. We don't have to. We know that so we can bring levity to it without diminishing what's the reality, but like. Also, like that area has like a very high potential for fun. So like, we can also have a little fun. Yeah, that is the source of pleasure in our lives if you really want to go there. We're gonna have to do this again because I really want to talk about the brain-vagina connection, the throat-vagina connection. There's a big one. That's, I have another episode called your voice is a muscle and like, we'll talk about that. mean, just Google an image of your vocal cords. Exactly. You're identical to your reproductive system. It's insane. It's, it's one of my favorite images and one I use often when it comes to women's groups, right? Because we're vocalizing together and we're sharing this womanhood and those two things are so connected. So we are going there the next time. I can't wait either. Jokes we could make. Alyssa, thank you so much for being on the show. Where can people find you? You can find me on my website, alisaalter.com. And I do, I invite you to download the workout and join my email list because I'm spending a little more time there. But I am also on Instagram, my handle is at alissaalter, A-L-I-S-S-A, A-L-T-E-R. So yeah, and we mentioned my podcast and the book, but all of that is all on the website. So that's a good place to start. You guys start, start listening to her podcasts. If you love my podcast, you're going to really love her podcast. You're welcome. Alissa. Thanks again for being on gutsy chick podcast. You

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